She Knows
by MusicOwl29
Summary: Post Evolution of the Daleks The Doctor looks back on on his mistakes and when the Daleks have appeared. Rose is there to comfort him even when she's not there.


The Doctor stood leaning against the Tardis console with his head in his hands. He sighed.

Martha was off exploring the Tardis after failing to get him to talk about what had him so upset. There were just too many things that troubled him. Martha wouldn't, no she couldn't understand what was wrong, and she never would. Because even after he lost everything, the Daleks always came back. They came just when he just started to allow himself to think that maybe this time they would finally be gone.

After the Time War even the one Dalek had caused him to fall apart, she had seen a different part of him because of the Dalek. And on the Game Station she had almost killed herself to save him, "I want you safe my Doctor, protected from the false god- The Time War ends". His pink and yellow human had done it all for him.

Then came Canary Wharf. The Daleks and Cybermen both bent on dominating the Earth. He had tried so hard to protect her. It had killed him putting the dimension hopper around her and the look on her face when she turned to look at him. But she had come back, except for this time she couldn't. It was impossible to get her back.

And now they had come back and still one got away. He had begged Dalek-human hybrids to kill him. Even if he knew the hybrids wouldn't shoot him, for just a split second he hoped they would. They could end his pain. Stop the ache in his hearts that grew at every reminder of her.

His English Rose.

He was scared to sleep, to see the fresh horrors his nightmares would bring. Before he dreamed of the Time War, now all he saw was either a multitude of ways she could've died or been lost, the Ghost Room, or their last conversation on that bloody beach. He had been an idiot, with no time left, he had still run, even if just slightly, from his feelings. He had admitted it so long ago to himself, before he had regenerated. It was after he regenerated that he accepted that he needed her, he would never willingly let go of Rose Tyler and that both his hearts belonged to her. He was given a last chance to say it , and he still couldn't say it out loud, he couldn't tell her how much he loved her. The Tardis hummed at him to try and comfort him.

"Thanks old Girl, but that won't help much. I need her."

"Doctor."

He lifted his head up. It couldn't be. He must be imagining things. Just like all the times he forgot she wasn't here and reached for her hand, only to find empty space or he'd walk in to the kitchen expecting to see her there drinking her tea and then look up at him with that smile and ask where they were going that day. He looked up just to make sure that it wasn't actually Martha and he was just too lost in thought to realize.

Instead he found a hologram of one Rose Tyler standing right where the emergency programs would be. He went and stood in front of her wishing that she was actually there to hug him and hold his hand.

"You told me a few days ago that there was a storm approaching, and the Tardis told me to record these in case I either died or got lost and you can't get to me. Right, first off no matter what, don't travel alone. You need someone there to hold your hand and to stop you from going too far.", said the hologram Rose.

"But I want you here with me Rose, I don't want anyone else, not really. I need you Rose", the Doctor whispered the end almost to himself.

"If you don't want someone new then go visit Jack or Sarah Jane or anyone, just don't be alone. You might go too far and accidently regenerate. And if I'm not dead I want to be able to recognize you when I get back."

"But it's impossible Rose, I've tried so hard. I can't get you back." the Doctor replied despair lacing his voice, wishing that the universe didn't feel the need to take away everything that he cared for.

"And don't you dare say it's impossible. Haven't you learned? I don't believe in impossible, I just don't. You might say it'll never happen, but you told me 'never say never, ever' so take your own advice."

"Oi, don't you get cheeky with me, Rose Tyler!" cried the Doctor cheering up slightly as he fell back into how easily they had always joked and talked.

"And Doctor even if it gets hard don't give up, cause that's not who you are. You're the one that never gives up and always manages to get others started again. If you don't want to do it for the universe or because it's what you should do, or other people want you to do it, then do it for me. Don't let anything get in your way of being the brilliant man you are."

"But they were Daleks, Rose. They took you away from me!"

"I don't care what it is, who it is, or why, just do what you always do. Figure everything out and then run. But don't run too far because I swear, as long as I'm breathing I will try to find a way back. After all, you need at least two people for a team, hope needs glory, and stuff of legends implies more than one Doctor."

"Oh Rose" answered the Doctor with a slightly wistful tone.

"One last thing Doctor, because knowing you, you're either gonna find trouble really soon or the worlds ending as you're watching this. There's an old saying that I remember from who knows where ' If you love someone let them go, and if they come back to you, you know they love you too.'

I know Doctor, we both always knew didn't we? I love you."

The image of Rose smiled and then disappeared.

The Doctor smiled a slightly sad and reminiscent smile. His fears of her not knowing abated.

That was how Martha found him a while later. Standing in the console room, looking considerably happier then when she had last seen him.

"Doctor?" she asked.

He looked up at her and she could tell from the look in his eyes that a weight had been lifted from him.

"Martha Jones how would you like to see dogs with no noses? Or sentient instruments, can you believe that instruments that play themselves, genius! It's right up there with edible ball bearings! ", he said with the beginning of an almost-back-to-being-as-maniac-as-before smile," Off we go Allonsy!"

All the while one thought ran through his head.

She knows.


End file.
